How important is goal setting in your life? Goals are great tools when used well. Goals can be misused though. Goals are misused when they are set from a place of should/have to or when we are striving for something that we think will make us feel more worthy and successful...once we get there.
Self Acceptance and Goals
Have you ever felt confused by the thought that if you just accept yourself the way you are that you would then be "letting yourself off too easy" and therefore wouldn't be able to achieve what you want? That you have to kick your own ass and punish yourself all the way to success?
I don't believe in that way of doing things. I think that we should start with developing self acceptance and from that place...set our goals.
We need self acceptance to set goals.
Self acceptance is the foundation that a solid and enjoyable life is built on.
Self acceptance allows us to have high standards of excellence without the heaviness of perfectionism.
If you are going to be a success, then you will need goals. To FEEL like a success you will need to have love and acceptance of your self the way you are. You will have to learn to treat your self as a success. This means not rejecting your self. This means that to be a real success, and feel like a success, that you will have to get rid of any self judgments.
Without self acceptance you can do great things and still be left feeling "unsuccessful". The self judgements rise above what we have achieved, often niggling at us with thoughts of not enough, it could have been better, I need more, etc;
But when we set goals from a foundation of self acceptance we can create incredible results that give us a sense of achievement, happiness and success. The outcome of starting with self acceptance is often a mindset that becomes truly positive and feels lighter, a mindset that sees more possibilities, and can more readily accept whatever results are achieved AND keep moving in the direction of the goal.
It's possible to accept and love yourself and still be committed to growth and your goals. Accepting yourself as you are today doesn't mean you will lose the motivation to change or improve, in fact I believe it will make you even more aware and effective. What are your thoughts on success, self acceptance and goals?